Sometimes I want to disappear
Take what is mine
Leave nothing here.
Sometimes I wish the end were near
Each day's too sad
without you here.
You left us right
When in your prime
Your light left night
Instead of shine.
Sometimes I want to disappear.
Can't find you
Were you ever here
Sometimes I wish the end were near.
The pain won't fade
without you here.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Walk Across the Line
I hurt. I ache. I find
No rest many times.
If I could, I'd walk across the line
and find you.
It seems easier in my mind
than to keep on
with this endless
need of you.
I love you, Megan.
Mom.
No rest many times.
If I could, I'd walk across the line
and find you.
It seems easier in my mind
than to keep on
with this endless
need of you.
I love you, Megan.
Mom.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Warning...Adult Content
Being an adult in the face of insurmountable grief.....Well, frankly, it is not a pretty sight or sound. It is quite graphic at times. The doors and windows are closed. Only the furniture could tell the story. Be thankful that it can't.
Recently, someone asked me how to do "it". I said you don't. At the beginning, the only choices are living or quitting. Living is a very loosely coined term in this context. It means you go from one moment to the next and aren't really certain how it happens.
Eventually, you raise the stakes to an hour, a half day, a day....No, I'm not up to a week. I sometimes manage one day better than the day before. For now, it is enough.
The "it" --which I am managing to accomplish better now--is the ability to put grief in a place inside of me while in public. This doesn't mean I'm OVER anything. It means I'm packing a load and feeling a strain. Somedays, I may show it--especially when the regular world is too demanding of my strength.
But, I try to be an adult about it. Try to be a sensible adult and spare others this ugliness.
Yes, this writing is extremely transparent. People with pain often don't have the strength to ask for help. I'll be brave enough to say please grant much comfort, space to breath, and love to those known as the bereaved. I've been blessed to have people in my life who do just this for me.
Much love to those people. They know who they are:)
Recently, someone asked me how to do "it". I said you don't. At the beginning, the only choices are living or quitting. Living is a very loosely coined term in this context. It means you go from one moment to the next and aren't really certain how it happens.
Eventually, you raise the stakes to an hour, a half day, a day....No, I'm not up to a week. I sometimes manage one day better than the day before. For now, it is enough.
The "it" --which I am managing to accomplish better now--is the ability to put grief in a place inside of me while in public. This doesn't mean I'm OVER anything. It means I'm packing a load and feeling a strain. Somedays, I may show it--especially when the regular world is too demanding of my strength.
But, I try to be an adult about it. Try to be a sensible adult and spare others this ugliness.
Yes, this writing is extremely transparent. People with pain often don't have the strength to ask for help. I'll be brave enough to say please grant much comfort, space to breath, and love to those known as the bereaved. I've been blessed to have people in my life who do just this for me.
Much love to those people. They know who they are:)
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Unanswered Questions
There is a beautiful song from one of my favorite songwriters, Gorden Jenson. The song is about Unanswered Questions.
I'm reading a book When Bad Things Happen to Good People. Yes, bad things do happen to good people. The author has lived the same questions that I am living. He is not afraid to delve into the deep abyss which most never have to look down into and see its darkness.
At this point, I'm only in the fourth chapter. My socks have blown off my feet and are across the room because he's nailing every thought and question with which I've wrestled in the past month and year. Of course, I am not able to explain all of it yet. Suffice it to say that God doesn't cause everything and all of our problems are not because we deserve it. Once I can put the thoughts into my own words, I'll explain.
There is a psychology word in the Greek language for the feeling of guilt and relief one feels when a terrible event happens in someone else's life. Yes, I felt that relief before knowing that it wasn't my child who had died. No parent on the other side ever believed it would be them who would live with the pain of loss for the remainder of their life.
I'm writing this prematurely and not explaining it at all. I just want you to know that I am relieved that I'm not alone in thinking there is something off in the balance and fairness of my faith. There is a solution or answer to the mystery with which I wrestle.
Be watching for the next blog when I can begin to put into words those thoughts I'm forming. And in the meantime, ask God, our Help, to be there for people who are in the middle of chaos such as perhaps Job faced. He may not fix everything but He is comfort. Sadly, our grieving minds have trouble wrapping this around the pain. Your friend or family member may need a gentle nudge and reminder with lots of love.
Offer them the book of which I'm scratching out answers.
It may save their life and mind.
I'm reading a book When Bad Things Happen to Good People. Yes, bad things do happen to good people. The author has lived the same questions that I am living. He is not afraid to delve into the deep abyss which most never have to look down into and see its darkness.
At this point, I'm only in the fourth chapter. My socks have blown off my feet and are across the room because he's nailing every thought and question with which I've wrestled in the past month and year. Of course, I am not able to explain all of it yet. Suffice it to say that God doesn't cause everything and all of our problems are not because we deserve it. Once I can put the thoughts into my own words, I'll explain.
There is a psychology word in the Greek language for the feeling of guilt and relief one feels when a terrible event happens in someone else's life. Yes, I felt that relief before knowing that it wasn't my child who had died. No parent on the other side ever believed it would be them who would live with the pain of loss for the remainder of their life.
I'm writing this prematurely and not explaining it at all. I just want you to know that I am relieved that I'm not alone in thinking there is something off in the balance and fairness of my faith. There is a solution or answer to the mystery with which I wrestle.
Be watching for the next blog when I can begin to put into words those thoughts I'm forming. And in the meantime, ask God, our Help, to be there for people who are in the middle of chaos such as perhaps Job faced. He may not fix everything but He is comfort. Sadly, our grieving minds have trouble wrapping this around the pain. Your friend or family member may need a gentle nudge and reminder with lots of love.
Offer them the book of which I'm scratching out answers.
It may save their life and mind.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Heaven--next trip??
Tonight where you are is day.
Tonight where you are All have found their way
to the Happy place with their Savior.
No one is in a rush to finish their dance
No one is feeling that they must push to get their chance
at His feet before their neighbor.
Sense the ease. Sense the peace. Sense the joy. Sense the fullness.
Heaven.
Are you ready?
Tonight where you are All have found their way
to the Happy place with their Savior.
No one is in a rush to finish their dance
No one is feeling that they must push to get their chance
at His feet before their neighbor.
Sense the ease. Sense the peace. Sense the joy. Sense the fullness.
Heaven.
Are you ready?
Sharing
Sharing as a little child....well, sometimes I wanted to share and sometimes I didn't. Then, when I wanted to share, I never wanted to give it all away. Just a portion. And that portion could vary in size from wee to massive. Always, it was according to how much I liked it.
Many of you have told me that you are glad that I'm sharing along my journey. Some of you really think that I'm sharing well and plentifully.
I assure you that I am not sharing plentifully. Yes, I'm sharing very honestly. Yet, there is a only a tiny portion of this journey from which I share. Otherwise, you'd be overwhelmed and fall down.
It seems that those of us destined to be traveling in this grief are equipped when this begins. Some deep inner strength seems to take over when one's route is thru the valley of the shadow of death.
Many days, I recall how in prior days I tried to help others. Clueless and I knew it. Yet, I thought I may have some inkling just from imagining. Now, I'm very, very grateful that I was extremely more clueless than I knew of how the grief felt.
What does this blog have to say?
I am OVERWHELMED with your kindnesses and your efforts to reach out and help me. Overwhelmed with your efforts to grasp what I'm trying to say. And, I'm overwhelmingly grateful that most all of you will never have total understanding of this journey because you won't travel it.
I will do all that I can to share because it helps me. I will share because it may help someone who is traveling through this valley. I will do all that I can to help others understand how to best support the travelers.
I love you my friends with whom I share life. I thank you for every kind word and deed.
Many of you have told me that you are glad that I'm sharing along my journey. Some of you really think that I'm sharing well and plentifully.
I assure you that I am not sharing plentifully. Yes, I'm sharing very honestly. Yet, there is a only a tiny portion of this journey from which I share. Otherwise, you'd be overwhelmed and fall down.
It seems that those of us destined to be traveling in this grief are equipped when this begins. Some deep inner strength seems to take over when one's route is thru the valley of the shadow of death.
Many days, I recall how in prior days I tried to help others. Clueless and I knew it. Yet, I thought I may have some inkling just from imagining. Now, I'm very, very grateful that I was extremely more clueless than I knew of how the grief felt.
What does this blog have to say?
I am OVERWHELMED with your kindnesses and your efforts to reach out and help me. Overwhelmed with your efforts to grasp what I'm trying to say. And, I'm overwhelmingly grateful that most all of you will never have total understanding of this journey because you won't travel it.
I will do all that I can to share because it helps me. I will share because it may help someone who is traveling through this valley. I will do all that I can to help others understand how to best support the travelers.
I love you my friends with whom I share life. I thank you for every kind word and deed.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Grief and Pain
The night is late. I have been floating thru the days and evenings in a state of numbness now for several days. Like in an anesthesia stupor.
My soul skitters away from the pain when the shadow of death brushes past. How do I embrace this pain?
It must be done. All of the experts state that fact. And, conversely, no one person grieves in the same way. Despair, agony, gloom, pain, excruciating pain. There is no recourse around this. Walk directly thru it.
In some way, grief is like death. Death occurs individually and randomly. It is appointed unto all of us. Some seems kinder. Some colder. But all will die. There is no recourse around this. All will walk directly into the shadow of death.
Grief is a journey. Death is the other journey. The two are merely parallel. Never will these meet on the earth.
So until the heaven, I am on a journey parallel and separate from my daughter.
My soul skitters away from the pain when the shadow of death brushes past. How do I embrace this pain?
It must be done. All of the experts state that fact. And, conversely, no one person grieves in the same way. Despair, agony, gloom, pain, excruciating pain. There is no recourse around this. Walk directly thru it.
In some way, grief is like death. Death occurs individually and randomly. It is appointed unto all of us. Some seems kinder. Some colder. But all will die. There is no recourse around this. All will walk directly into the shadow of death.
Grief is a journey. Death is the other journey. The two are merely parallel. Never will these meet on the earth.
So until the heaven, I am on a journey parallel and separate from my daughter.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Where are you?
I open this document. Type a title and panic. Rush over to the back button.....and....pause. The pain is too great but I have to bear it. It must be felt or it will consume me some day.
Visiting within your four walls, touching your valued treasures, smelling clothes you wore. There isn't enough time to find you.....and yet you are everywhere.
You, in pieces behind closet doors, on the walls, among the dresser drawers, stuffed in school bags. Shoes that I brought you, then, you walked in, remain stuffed in shoe bags and rest on the shelves. Amazingly, there are shoes which had not yet known adventure.
Little papers with notes to your guy and your friends are tucked in places to be found yet again by you. You are the one to whom the notes were written and it is for you that they have meaning. Receipts, books, binders, schedules forever paused only offer the significance of halted dreams. Plans with no future.
No, I couldn't find you yesterday. Today? Oh, how I wish.
Visiting within your four walls, touching your valued treasures, smelling clothes you wore. There isn't enough time to find you.....and yet you are everywhere.
You, in pieces behind closet doors, on the walls, among the dresser drawers, stuffed in school bags. Shoes that I brought you, then, you walked in, remain stuffed in shoe bags and rest on the shelves. Amazingly, there are shoes which had not yet known adventure.
Little papers with notes to your guy and your friends are tucked in places to be found yet again by you. You are the one to whom the notes were written and it is for you that they have meaning. Receipts, books, binders, schedules forever paused only offer the significance of halted dreams. Plans with no future.
No, I couldn't find you yesterday. Today? Oh, how I wish.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Not Imagining
Since the time of Megan's passing, I think often of places which I rarely thought of before. And, just as we know is true of educating children, experience is the best way to gain understanding of formerly alien concepts.
Now, when I go to a cemetery, I understand that beneath my feet is my beautiful daughter's body in a dark box. No, I never got that understanding from losing grandparents, in-laws, friends. It took an earthquake experience to give me this understanding. Enough understanding that if I think too long, it urges me to peel the earth back and move her.
Heaven is a place that I no longer imagine as a place that there really are people who smile and talk to one another and recognize Megan. I need to know it. I need to know some who never met her are thrilled to know her on the eternal side of life. This experience of her death has left me trying to feel and know about this heaven beyond my imaginings. I'd like to know the events of every day. I want to read every book ever written by anyone who had a death experience and lived to return to this planet.
To think of heaven now is to think of a bright soul who is so delightful and precious that even Jesus smiles bigger. That the friends and family already there are now even happier. It isn't that far away now because my daughter is there. I think of it often and wonder what she is doing. Yes, she lives there so I know she is doing something. As her mother, I need to know these things!
As I struggled to worship this morning, overcoming my doubts and my questions, I gained a sense of what she was doing. We sang Revelation Song....."Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God almighty.....". That is what she is doing most often now. Somehow, I knew for that brief few moments that I was joining her and doing the exact same thing as she was at the exact same time. It brought me a joy in that moment to know we were joined.
She really is there in heaven. Heaven is a real place. My experience makes it real.
So, for today, for a while, the fog of grief in my mind, lifted enough for me to sing with my daughter.
Now, when I go to a cemetery, I understand that beneath my feet is my beautiful daughter's body in a dark box. No, I never got that understanding from losing grandparents, in-laws, friends. It took an earthquake experience to give me this understanding. Enough understanding that if I think too long, it urges me to peel the earth back and move her.
Heaven is a place that I no longer imagine as a place that there really are people who smile and talk to one another and recognize Megan. I need to know it. I need to know some who never met her are thrilled to know her on the eternal side of life. This experience of her death has left me trying to feel and know about this heaven beyond my imaginings. I'd like to know the events of every day. I want to read every book ever written by anyone who had a death experience and lived to return to this planet.
To think of heaven now is to think of a bright soul who is so delightful and precious that even Jesus smiles bigger. That the friends and family already there are now even happier. It isn't that far away now because my daughter is there. I think of it often and wonder what she is doing. Yes, she lives there so I know she is doing something. As her mother, I need to know these things!
As I struggled to worship this morning, overcoming my doubts and my questions, I gained a sense of what she was doing. We sang Revelation Song....."Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God almighty.....". That is what she is doing most often now. Somehow, I knew for that brief few moments that I was joining her and doing the exact same thing as she was at the exact same time. It brought me a joy in that moment to know we were joined.
She really is there in heaven. Heaven is a real place. My experience makes it real.
So, for today, for a while, the fog of grief in my mind, lifted enough for me to sing with my daughter.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Walking in the Night
Danger all around
Lurking sight unseen
No one's there to hold your hand
Fear consumes your dreams
Hopes and plans threatened
By the dark you're plunging through
Silence overwhelms, deafens
Is no one here but you?
Others have been here
Some are walking now
Reach out for another
Feel their hand stretched out
Right along beside them
The Greater One does trod
You're not meant to walk alone
Quite nears the Awesome God
Walking in the night
Is not meant to be done alone
On the road one may trip or stumble
Even on the smallest stone
Each step you take His hand is there
It guides where you can't see
No, you're not meant to walk alone
I've been there, I believe
Lurking sight unseen
No one's there to hold your hand
Fear consumes your dreams
Hopes and plans threatened
By the dark you're plunging through
Silence overwhelms, deafens
Is no one here but you?
Others have been here
Some are walking now
Reach out for another
Feel their hand stretched out
Right along beside them
The Greater One does trod
You're not meant to walk alone
Quite nears the Awesome God
Walking in the night
Is not meant to be done alone
On the road one may trip or stumble
Even on the smallest stone
Each step you take His hand is there
It guides where you can't see
No, you're not meant to walk alone
I've been there, I believe
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Tonight
Tonight I decide.
Tonight I decide it is time.
Tonight I decide it is time to write.
To write about the beautiful girl who I was so very glad to call mine.
Yes, I've begun some lines.
Some lines which aren't ready for eyes.
Which aren't ready for eyes and hearts to read.
To read because they're still pouring from inside of me.
Tonight I decide it is time.
Tonight I decide it is time to write.
To write about the beautiful girl who I was so very glad to call mine.
Yes, I've begun some lines.
Some lines which aren't ready for eyes.
Which aren't ready for eyes and hearts to read.
To read because they're still pouring from inside of me.
Where to
These words will not begin to pay
Tribute to the beautiful girl who went away
So quickly did she flee to be
A star flung 'cross the sky for me
To see each night as I look out
And wonder if she looks about
The heavens on the other shore
To find the ones who went before
Sunday, February 27, 2011
His part and My Extra
Today I heart GIVING.
Granted I've always known that it was a Bible principle. The fact of which is why I practiced it in my church throughout my life.
The fantastically heart touching AHA moment from God today may not reveal anything new to you--but the core of me is zinging from what I got in my soul
Jesus left the earth. He left it with the disciples of old and the ones who walk on earth today. We live out the gospel by touching, feeding, telling the gospel story, loving children, homeless......The list goes on. He chooses to use our body as flesh and blood to do this. When we don't, he looks for someone who will. It is HIS plan on how to get His Spirit, His love and His message into the world. He won't be assuming another body to do it.
Likewise with the talents he's given us to offer in service for HIS kingdom first. If you sing, then offer it for HIM and then use it for other venues. If you speak, make sure that you can use it for HIM as well as your own choices. FIRST for HIM always. If you write, if you paint, if you design, if you construct. Let HIM have use of your talent first.
The AHA came today and I can explain it kind of like this.
If money is needed to further the Gospel, clothe and feed homeless, touch broken countries and desolate peoples, see souls delivered and saved.....Then we are the body thru which He makes sure it happens.
There are no magic money trees in the yards of the church. He makes sure that He puts it into human beings bank accounts ---- If not His kingdom would have no way to get money.
So, he takes a bunch of human beings who are willing to let Him funnel money thru them to the church--then, he gives you 90% and more as a bonus for letting Him use you as "the money funnel"
Actually, I don't and shouldn't have any money. I don't deserve any of it. He just is SO glad that I'm willing to let Him use me and my bank account to get money to His kingdom when He physically can't do it. Or at least He CHOOSES to not rain money in the church yard.....Tho of course, I believe He could.
But, joy oh joy, He lets me put the money in the church yard, the church tithes, the church offering, the church kitchen, the churchless, the homeless, the hopeless....
And then, I get money of my own to keep as a bonus!
I just unpacked some delicious groceries----I said Thank You Jesus for making sure I had extra money to go buy these delicious groceries.
I let Him use me to get 10% into the kingdom and then I can offer some more of what is extra up to HIM. He gives a lot of extra, too.
Granted I've always known that it was a Bible principle. The fact of which is why I practiced it in my church throughout my life.
The fantastically heart touching AHA moment from God today may not reveal anything new to you--but the core of me is zinging from what I got in my soul
Jesus left the earth. He left it with the disciples of old and the ones who walk on earth today. We live out the gospel by touching, feeding, telling the gospel story, loving children, homeless......The list goes on. He chooses to use our body as flesh and blood to do this. When we don't, he looks for someone who will. It is HIS plan on how to get His Spirit, His love and His message into the world. He won't be assuming another body to do it.
Likewise with the talents he's given us to offer in service for HIS kingdom first. If you sing, then offer it for HIM and then use it for other venues. If you speak, make sure that you can use it for HIM as well as your own choices. FIRST for HIM always. If you write, if you paint, if you design, if you construct. Let HIM have use of your talent first.
The AHA came today and I can explain it kind of like this.
If money is needed to further the Gospel, clothe and feed homeless, touch broken countries and desolate peoples, see souls delivered and saved.....Then we are the body thru which He makes sure it happens.
There are no magic money trees in the yards of the church. He makes sure that He puts it into human beings bank accounts ---- If not His kingdom would have no way to get money.
So, he takes a bunch of human beings who are willing to let Him funnel money thru them to the church--then, he gives you 90% and more as a bonus for letting Him use you as "the money funnel"
Actually, I don't and shouldn't have any money. I don't deserve any of it. He just is SO glad that I'm willing to let Him use me and my bank account to get money to His kingdom when He physically can't do it. Or at least He CHOOSES to not rain money in the church yard.....Tho of course, I believe He could.
But, joy oh joy, He lets me put the money in the church yard, the church tithes, the church offering, the church kitchen, the churchless, the homeless, the hopeless....
And then, I get money of my own to keep as a bonus!
I just unpacked some delicious groceries----I said Thank You Jesus for making sure I had extra money to go buy these delicious groceries.
I let Him use me to get 10% into the kingdom and then I can offer some more of what is extra up to HIM. He gives a lot of extra, too.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Believe
This afternoon as I watched the Piers Morgan interview of Oprah, I noted a few things to myself.
She lives. She lives in the moment. Of course, she has others taking care of many tasks so I'm sure it is much easier to live in the moment.....But still, she believes it is important to be present in the now. This is probably the hardest thing for me to accomplish.
She has a small inner circle of friends that she trusts. She believes in the power of friendship. Loyal, integral inner circle. These people will not betray her. She believes that.
Then, she told Piers that her Brand is "Love". Her goal is to allow people to grow, open their hearts and love. When questioned about other things which may be her brand, she stated firmly "My brand is love". She believes it. Her brand is Love.
Oprah knows her limitations and personal strengths. She knows and believes that she is in the "lane" for which she is suited. Her belief that one should stay in the lane where one fits and thrives is a lesson for all of us.
Can money make one happy? She believes it can certainly make it easier to have the opportunity to be happy. And, I believe that we all can share that philosophy!
Then, in turn, she also gives. She believes one gives to others to bless them. Roughly quoting her "to whom much is given, much should be given back". Maybe then, it isn't luck and chance that has made her the billionaire celebrity. Think about that as we envy her wealth.
The most honorable statement she offered is how she knows that she is standing on the shoulders of many who paved the way for a black woman to be in her shoes. She stays connected and grounded in this knowledge. She reveres Dr. Martin Luther King for his work which afforded the opportunity for her to be successful. Believe in the work of others and regard it with respect.
In all of these thoughts as well as other statements and opinions offered, it is easy to see why and how Oprah is where she is today. I surmise it like this. Have a dream; Find friends to believe in the dream with you; Get in the lane where it can occur; Start working in the lane while sharing love and whatever your special "brand" is for the world. And most of all, give and give again.
Believe it, work toward it and it will happen. Now that my friend is how to make sure we reach our potential and purpose on the planet.
Danette
Disclaimer: I am not promoting everything to which Oprah Winfrey subscribes. I'm looking at the success and ideals which may have influenced said success.
She lives. She lives in the moment. Of course, she has others taking care of many tasks so I'm sure it is much easier to live in the moment.....But still, she believes it is important to be present in the now. This is probably the hardest thing for me to accomplish.
She has a small inner circle of friends that she trusts. She believes in the power of friendship. Loyal, integral inner circle. These people will not betray her. She believes that.
Then, she told Piers that her Brand is "Love". Her goal is to allow people to grow, open their hearts and love. When questioned about other things which may be her brand, she stated firmly "My brand is love". She believes it. Her brand is Love.
Oprah knows her limitations and personal strengths. She knows and believes that she is in the "lane" for which she is suited. Her belief that one should stay in the lane where one fits and thrives is a lesson for all of us.
Can money make one happy? She believes it can certainly make it easier to have the opportunity to be happy. And, I believe that we all can share that philosophy!
Then, in turn, she also gives. She believes one gives to others to bless them. Roughly quoting her "to whom much is given, much should be given back". Maybe then, it isn't luck and chance that has made her the billionaire celebrity. Think about that as we envy her wealth.
The most honorable statement she offered is how she knows that she is standing on the shoulders of many who paved the way for a black woman to be in her shoes. She stays connected and grounded in this knowledge. She reveres Dr. Martin Luther King for his work which afforded the opportunity for her to be successful. Believe in the work of others and regard it with respect.
In all of these thoughts as well as other statements and opinions offered, it is easy to see why and how Oprah is where she is today. I surmise it like this. Have a dream; Find friends to believe in the dream with you; Get in the lane where it can occur; Start working in the lane while sharing love and whatever your special "brand" is for the world. And most of all, give and give again.
Believe it, work toward it and it will happen. Now that my friend is how to make sure we reach our potential and purpose on the planet.
Danette
Disclaimer: I am not promoting everything to which Oprah Winfrey subscribes. I'm looking at the success and ideals which may have influenced said success.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Sun on the Journey
The sun is behind you
Blazing a trail before you.
Enjoy the warmth and the light
Remember its certain return after every night.
Days cloudy, rainy, gloomy cast shadows
Only where the sun brightly glows
Behind them
Blazing a trail before you
Danette
Blazing a trail before you.
Enjoy the warmth and the light
Remember its certain return after every night.
Days cloudy, rainy, gloomy cast shadows
Only where the sun brightly glows
Behind them
Blazing a trail before you
Danette
Hold Me
Many years ago, these words dropped into my heart with music. I sang it then. I sing it now. And I post it as a poem for you. May it give you hope as it does me.
Hold Me
Hold Me
The day’s been long and full of pain
I feel my back bend ‘neath the strain
My mind’s so full of what I’ve seen
I can’t remember anything.
Could You hold me
Could You love me
Could You tell me once more why You saved me
If You do, I know I’m sure to make the journey
Just one more time to be with You
I know it’s bound to pull me thru
Just like a dream that I can’t see
I feel You gently touching me
Danette
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Start to Finish
Today I heard "There's no reason to begin it unless you're going to complete it" as Michael Douglas referred to his cancer treatment and his philosophy through it.
And immediately I realized how true the statement was for me. I am goal oriented, bored if I don't have a challenge, and am determined to succeed. There is no way I will settle for a C when I can make an A.
What have I started in my life lately which has me determined to complete it?
My journey with Christ is the first and foremost completion I have in mind. Living out the gospel completely until I'm totally spent.
Then, of course there are two lovely people in this world who wouldn't have started without me. Rion and Megan. My heart is yours until life is completed. Although, is love ever really completed?
What else matters enough to begin with completion in mind? Friendships. Oh, yes, the friends with whom I am able to walk honestly along this path. We travel and separate and merge again. Yet, the truth of friendship means we can come back together and complete what we started. And, I love all of the "whats" that we've started.
I've begun writing, teaching, laughing, singing all along in my life. Hopefully, somewhere along the way, someone has been motivated, blessed, touched.
Why did I begin any of these in my life? I confess that I do complain and sometimes am tired. Yet, I can't stop. It is so true. I began knowing I would complete them.
Danette
1/12/11
And immediately I realized how true the statement was for me. I am goal oriented, bored if I don't have a challenge, and am determined to succeed. There is no way I will settle for a C when I can make an A.
What have I started in my life lately which has me determined to complete it?
My journey with Christ is the first and foremost completion I have in mind. Living out the gospel completely until I'm totally spent.
Then, of course there are two lovely people in this world who wouldn't have started without me. Rion and Megan. My heart is yours until life is completed. Although, is love ever really completed?
What else matters enough to begin with completion in mind? Friendships. Oh, yes, the friends with whom I am able to walk honestly along this path. We travel and separate and merge again. Yet, the truth of friendship means we can come back together and complete what we started. And, I love all of the "whats" that we've started.
I've begun writing, teaching, laughing, singing all along in my life. Hopefully, somewhere along the way, someone has been motivated, blessed, touched.
Why did I begin any of these in my life? I confess that I do complain and sometimes am tired. Yet, I can't stop. It is so true. I began knowing I would complete them.
Danette
1/12/11
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Surprises
Everybody loves surprises! Or at least a GOOD surprise.
Like snow and its calm, silent beauty of white.
Like a baby's very first smile.
A new possibility to explore when it seemed none existed.
Or a new friend that just really clicks when you meet them.
And a special, personal touch from the Father when your heart feels frozen.
I must believe in joyful surprises.
Like snow and its calm, silent beauty of white.
Like a baby's very first smile.
A new possibility to explore when it seemed none existed.
Or a new friend that just really clicks when you meet them.
And a special, personal touch from the Father when your heart feels frozen.
I must believe in joyful surprises.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Simple
Simple can mean less. My home is small and easy to maintain. Simple. Thankful.
Simple can mean not mixed. I plan to live for each new day . I want to leave the past behind me. Simple. Thankful.
Simple can mean plain, unornamented. I want to be an authentic, real teacher and friend. Simple. Thankful.
I'm thankful for simple. Less is sometimes more. Right now, I will choose to be present and thankful.
Simple.
Simple can mean not mixed. I plan to live for each new day . I want to leave the past behind me. Simple. Thankful.
Simple can mean plain, unornamented. I want to be an authentic, real teacher and friend. Simple. Thankful.
I'm thankful for simple. Less is sometimes more. Right now, I will choose to be present and thankful.
Simple.
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