Grief is different for all people. No finger print is alike and no grief is alike. Seriously. Each must "do" grief so as to find their own way thru the valley of the shadow of death.
No, one does not get over a death of a piece of your flesh. Yet, somehow, the minutes, the hours, the days, the weeks, get a bit easier. I've been muddling through why this is true.
First, I believe, once a grieving mind can find periods of clarity of consciousness, any decision to focus toward health or toward negativity rapidly begins to influence the health and survival of the grieving.
Today, I had happy moments, sunshine moments, great moments of physical exercise, success at work, and then, at the end of the day....I cried. Simply because I ache to know that my beautiful daughter is no where on this earth shining and smiling. The cup of emptiness was set before me and I drank from it.
After a while, I dried my face, still empty but able to find a way to pause and find strength to move past the pain of the empty.
I believe that what I am now understanding and experiencing as I have days with more sunshine....is the fact that grief is not as scary. As time passes, a little bit of light begins to shine thru the shadows. It causes the pain and grief to be illuminated so one knows more how to deal with it and survive the times in which one must stop and grieve. And the memories and sensations surrounding the passed loved one begin to be more easy to face without as much fear of losing them.
I am healing and I am grieving. And I am moving toward living a positivity filled life filled with as many smile as I can muster in honor of my "Blue Sky Daughter, Megan Brooke".
Love you, girl. Sing and show those angels up:) Smile, dance, and laugh your way thru sunshine field and gold streets.
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